The Road to Raleigh

Remember this?

And then there was this:

 

So in July, after much thought and searching for other 70.3 races, I did this:

 



After the events of last June, there was no doubt in my mind that I would return to the Raleigh 70.3 starting line this year with a new confidence, different training, and an unbreakable spirit. 

The road to Raleigh wasn't without potholes and roadblocks.  There were setbacks from injuries. I was forced to take 8 weeks off from running at the start of 2014 due to a nagging injury that occurred during marathon training.  I saw my  Chiropractor more than my hubby some weeks as I worked through impingement syndrome in my shoulders that kept me out of the pool for a month.  Although I had to work through physical issues to get to the starting line on June 1 (and in turn, come back stronger), I never let doubt creep into my training.  If I couldn't run on the road, I would run in the pool.  Couldn't swim?  Ramp up the miles and hours on the bike trainer.  Daily stretching, compression sleeves, and rest became part of my routine.  My training was solid, focused, and manageable, but I did not let it take over my life.  I found a balance that worked for our family (hubby was training for Raleigh, too), and my kiddos were present and involved with the majority of my training time--I swam laps with the Reporter, pushed The Little Guy in the jogger as the Reporter rode for bike for miles as I ran, and I relocated my bike trainer to the patio for many Sunday afternoon rides while the kids played in the yard for hours on end. 

With a bitterly cold winter (Polar Vortex, anyone?), Jordan Lake's water temperature hovered in the chilly range for months, making Open Water Swim practice unbearable.  I worried that I wouldn't get the time in the lake that I needed before the race, but I also said a prayer everyday that the water temperature would stay low enough to read 76 degrees or lower on June 1, ensuring a wetsuit legal swim. 

The first Open Water Swim of the season for hubby and me was on May 10, less than one month until race day.  Earlier that week we decided to register for The Jordan Lake Open Water Swim Challenge (1.2 miles for me and 2.4 for the hubs).  I mean, there's nothing like making your first OWS of the season a 1.2 mile race, right?  Luckily I was able to wear my wetsuit, and after checking in, I calmed the fears that were beginning to bubble up by getting in the water, without hesitation, for a quick warm up.  At that moment, I knew that this year was different.  There was no fear, no panic, no drama, and no tears.  When my swim wave was called to start, I calmly approached the starting line, counted to 10 after the starting horn sounded, and swam without fear for 58 minutes and 20 seconds.  I only paused to sight along the way (the buoys were spaced pretty far apart) and I didn't meet a single kayaker or lifeguard.  As I emerged from the water, I realized that this swim had given me the confidence I needed to get to the starting line on June 1.  Between May 10 and June 1, I did two more short open water swims with friends, but I knew that I was ready for Raleigh.

 

Most of my training rides for Raleigh took place on the trainer this year, both out of necessity and fear.  Over the past year, my eyes have been opened to the danger of the road with several friends suffering injuries from crashes on training rides.  Because of that, and my two sidekicks, I put in hours upon hours on the trainer.  While I found it frustrating not to log the big miles on the road, I knew that I was getting in much needed saddle time (2, 3, 3.5 hours at a stretch) and building mental stamina.  My first road ride for 2014 was over Easter Weekend (less than 6 weeks before the race).  It started out strong, riding with my dad and the hubby, but before the halfway point, I lost it.  Cars felt too close, the wind felt too strong, and the miles felt way too long.  There was a tantrum on the side of the road, that may have involved tears.  But when you are 15 miles from home, you don't have much of a choice about riding. . .  you have to get home.  As I completed the final 25 miles of that training ride, something happened.  I vowed to let my faith be bigger than my fear, and I began to see the payoff of all those Sunday patio rides.  Faster pacing, consistent cadence, increased steadiness. . .  I just had to find it on that road to find my confidence on the bike.  I only completed three more rides on the road prior to the race --2 on the first 35 miles of the Raleigh 70.3 course and 2 rides posting my fastest average pace on the bike ever.   I finished that last ride with a new outlook and a positive mindset.

Running proved to be a hurdle this year, as well.  While it is usually the strongest of the three disciplines, for me (even though I am far from speedy), starting 2014 on the sidelines didn't bode well for training.  While I was training for my first marathon (a blog post I really should've written), I began feeling soreness in my shins that resulted in multiple trips to the Sports Med doc, two different visits to orthopedic specialists and, finally, a series of Active Release (ART) treatments.  Once I was cleared to run, I had to start low and slow and I was worried that the build up to 13.1 for Raleigh would be too much.  However, I stuck to the plan, employed a run-walk method and added lots of stretching and strength training.  On April 26 I ran the Tarheel Ten Miler, unsure that I would finish with a smile on my face.  My paces had been significantly slower since returning to running and I knew that the course was challenging, as I had run it in 2012.  After a two mile warm up (the plan called for 14 that day, but I was being conservative), I ran the fastest pace that I had clocked in months.  Not back to my speed that I found last summer, but a satisfying sub-10 pace for 10 hilly miles.  After that boost of confidence, I continued logging miles toward half-iron training, many with my favorite cheerleaders in tow. 

 

 

As the date for Raleigh 70.3 grew closer, my confidence grew and my fears lessened.  I knew that I had done everything I could do to prepare for redemption. 

 

But had I done enough? 

 

 



#allsmiles (Ramseur International Triathlon Race Report)

After my 70.3 heartbreak and comeback in June, I jumped right back into training after a week of recovery, even though I didn't have a race on the calendar.  In my heart, I really wanted to try another 70.3 race, so I began to focus my training on feeling more confident in the water and improving my bike skills.  However, mid-way through the summer, while talking with a friend about my Fall schedule, I realized that completing another 70.3 race in the middle of trying to train for my first full marathon probably wasn't the best idea.  I decided to look for an International Distance triathlon instead since it would still challenge me with a longer swim, but wouldn't require at least a week of recovery after race day.  As I began to narrow my options for races in our area, an opportunity fell into my lap via a fantastic community that the hubby and I have become a part of.  As part of a Freebie Friday Giveaway, I was gifted a free (FREE) entry into the Ramsuer International Triathlon.  This was only the second year of this race that is about 45 minutes from our front door.  I had toyed with doing it last year, and had looked at the website multiple times for the race this year, but hesitated to commit. . . Until this freebie found its way to me!

I quickly registered and penciled it into the calendar, but didn't give it much more thought until race week arrived.  No stressing, no panic filled thoughts, just continuing to swim and run, while letting my bike slide a bit.  Honestly, I have never approached a race with such calmness and with so few worries.  The week before the race, I received emails with race details and water temperature updates that I glanced over and discarded.  (It was 82 a week prior to the race, but temps were dropping and nighttime lows were low, so I remained hopeful for a wetsuit legal swim.)  The night before the race I decided to clean the house, do four loads of laundry and bake a batch of chocolate chip cookies.  My bags for transition didn't get packed until 10pm, and even then I wasn't sure that I had everything.  However, the calmness remained and the panic stayed away.  A quick check of the water temperature online (77 degrees) indicated that I needed to add my wetsuit to my bag before turning in for the night. 

5:00 am came early the next morning.  Coffee was made, bags and bike were loaded up and sleeping kiddos were moved from beds to car seats.  As the hubby drove, I told him how amazed I was that my usual pre-race jitters were essentially non-existent.  I continued by saying something that I had told several friends the evening before as they wished me luck--This race was ONLY about having fun.  Nothing more.  I wanted to go out, have a good time, and smile as much as possible.  "This is like a fun training day!"

When we arrived at the race site, I realized that the field of athletes was fairly small--maybe 200 total, but if the bikes in transition were any indicator of talent, there were a few fierce competitors in the field.  In fact, a former pro triathlete that the hubby knows was there to compete in hopes of taking home a cash prize as a top finisher. (He did just that with a 2:01 finishing time).

As I set out my essentials for each leg of the race, I began to feel the panic creep in, especially when the director announced that the swim would begin right after the pre-race meeting.  After I shimmied  squeezed into my wetsuit, kissed the hubby and kids, I made my way down to the water with the rest of the athletes who were nervously engaging in pre-race chatter. 

The men entered the water first at 8:00 with the women following at 8:04.  As soon as the men made their way to the first buoy, I decided to submerge myself and take a few practice strokes.  As soon as I hit the water, the panic began--the water felt cold and seemed darker than the lake I was accustomed to swimming in.  After a few nervous strokes out and back to the shore, I stood up and scanned the shoreline for the hubby.  When I got his attention, I mouthed, "I don't want to do this", shaking my head.  Before I had time to think about it, the horn sounded, signaling the start of the race.  I took a deep breath, counted to 10, and started swimming toward the first buoy.  I got about 25 meters from shore when I stopped to breaststroke and regroup.  For a split second, I turned to look at the shore and thought to myself, "It's not that far to go back, but it is pretty far to keep going".  Just then, a struggling swimmer came beside me spluttering and panicking.  I was reminded of a girl, who not so long ago, might have turned back, and then I said out loud, "I'm not finished" and turned to swim into the race course instead of back to shore. 

The swim was a two-loop configuration with six buoys marking the course.  My thoughts through the first two buoys were to stay calm and find a rhythm.  Swim buoy to buoy and focus on something positive.  By the third buoy, I felt a wake of water surround me as the first male competitor (the hubby's friend) was speeding quickly through his second loop.  At that point I set two goals for myself--pass someone (anyone) and don't let all the men pass me on their second loop.  (The hubby had given me a goal in the car that morning--don't come out of the water knowing any of the kaykers and their life stories.  In other words, don't hang onto a boat and chat it up while "catching your breath".)

The remainder of my swim was calm and focused.  In fact, it was probably the most peaceful swim I had ever experienced.  I concentrated on gliding, breathing and focusing on the positive of the moment.  43 minutes and 8 seconds from my starting time, I walked out of the water, smiling, with a new sense of confidence.  Every goal I set in the water, I met.  In fact, I passed men in the water on my second loop!  I also met hubby's goal by not stopping or resting at a single boat on the course.  My swim speed still has a long way to go, but I was able to keep moving forward the entire swim and that was a huge step for me. 

I transitioned slowly from the swim to the bike, and noticed that my slow (but steady) swim placed me at the back of the pack of cyclists on the course.  As soon as I got onto the road, I began regretting all of the mornings that I had slept in, ignoring the bike trainer.  Truth be told, it had been weeks since I had ridden, and it showed.  The course was full of rolling hills with a few challenging climbs scattered throughout.  I decided not to worry about my lack of training and just enjoy the ride, and since it seemed that Fall had arrived while I was swimming, there was plenty to enjoy.  The weather was overcast and cool and a few colorful leaves marked my path.  Most of my ride was solo, as the other riders were ahead, but I did manage to catch and pass a few women and even a couple of men over the 40K bike ride.  I arrived in transition smiling and ready to run.

After racking my bike, I set out for what is usually my favorite part of triathlon--the run.  However, I had been battling a lower leg "injury" for six weeks leading up to the race.  I was unsure how my leg would hold up for the run and was ready to pull out if I needed to.  I timidly left transition at a pretty good pace, with a plan to follow the 4 minutes on-1 minute off plan that I had been using in the weeks leading up to the race.  After 4 minutes of running, I asked myself if a walk was needed.  Nope.  So I kept pushing on and decided to "check-in" again at 8 minutes.  I continued this method for the remainder of the course, but only "needed" to walk twice (up a long gravel hill leading to and from the trail).  The run was two loops, some of which was on a great trail, and I found myself moving effortlessly and passing both men and women on both loops.  As I began the final leg of the run, uphill, I peeked at my watch.  I knew what my last International distance time had been and as long as I could make it up the hill and across the finish line, I was going to smash that time.
And I did. A 17 minute PR made my smile even bigger as I crossed the finish line.

After a quick soak in the lake, I gathered up my things from transition and asked the hubby if he had seen the posted results.  I felt certain that I hadn't finished anywhere near the front, but I was curious about my standings within my age group, figuring that I was somewhere near the back of the pack even though it was a smaller race.  We walked over to the awards area and scanned the posted results, but couldn't find my age group.  Since we were both curious to hear the winning times for my age group, we decided to hang out a bit. 

Soon, the announcer said, "And in the Women 35-39 group, In FIRST place, with a time of 3:19:54"

Wait.

I looked at my watch.

That was my time.

What?

"Erin Leventhal"

I couldn't believe it.  Surely there was someone faster.  I mean, seriously, that time is not crazy fast.  However, the other three women in my age group finished 4, 6, 23 minutes behind me. 

First place in my age.

Later in the day, The Reporter was getting ready to leave for a sleepover and she came into my room.  "I'm so proud of you, Mom," she said.  I wiped a tear away as she turned to leave.  "Me too," I thought.  But not for winning my age group.  I was proud of staying calm and not getting caught up in the stress of the moment.   I was proud of staying in the race when I had a moment of doubt or fear.  I was proud of pushing through when the swim, ride, or run got tough. 

But most of all I was proud of staying #allsmiles for the duration of the race--as I found my happy, my confidence and my peace while having fun doing something I love.

 



 

So. . . What Happened? (Or my 70.3 Race Report)

When organizing my own 70.3 (Half Iron Distance Race), the one request that was universal from the support crew was a later wake-up than the 3:30am call we had for Raleigh 70.3.  They didn't have to tell me twice.  Saturday evening I organized gear and made the final calls/texts to set-up the big event and we agreed on an 8:00 start time, which meant a 6:00 wake up (MUCH better ).  But when 6:00am rolled around on Sunday morning, there were so many things to be done!  Kids to feed, snacks to pack, bikes to load, and ice towels to soak!  We got a late start, but I was surprisingly calm through it all (well, as calm as I typically am when herding children anywhere!)

As we drove to the lake and I was reviewing plans with the hubby, I suddenly looked up to see not one but two familiar cars on the road in front of us.  My brother and his girlfriend, as well as Coach E's wife and daughter were making their way to the lake to support, cheer and even take part in portions of this little crazy Sunday morning (and afternoon) I had planned.  I couldn't stop the tears that sprung into my eyes.  Every single person that was on the way had sacrificed their Sunday the previous week to stand in the blazing hot sun at Ironman Raleigh 70.3.  And here they were again, for little old me.  The love and support I felt at that moment continued throughout the day as I was reminded over and over again of how wonderfully blessed I am with supportive friends and family.

Coach E had checked the lake conditions after the torrential downpours our area had received on Friday night and had reported that there would be some debris on the lake in spots, but it would be safe for swimming.  As we drove across the first of many bridges leading to Ebenezer Point (our home base for the day), I noticed the debris on the water first, but the hubby called my attention to the conditions.  The entire lake looked like a sheet of glass.  He said, "You couldn't ask for more beautiful water this morning" and he was right.  After the rolling waves and white caps of the previous week and that terrible swim, this was perfect.  This was what I needed to get my head back in the game and slay this dragon.

After pulling into the parking lot and getting last minute details nailed down with my crew for the day, I set up T1 and T2 in the back of the Honda Pilot.  (For those of you that are not familiar with triathlon, T1 and T2 and simply transition areas.  This is where the athletes rack their bikes, keep their supplies for each leg of the race and change equipment between disciplines.) I laid out bike shoes and helmet, tri top and running shoes, visor and water bottles.  I had a box full of nutritional supplements and a cooler full of water bottles to keep me going and pointed these out to the group, so the hubby and friends would be able to find what I needed. (For Raleigh 70.3, I had trained with the products that Ironman would use on the course, so I didn't worry with packing my own things that day.  When I decided to attempt this on my own, I had to fill in some holes with things that would have been available on the course.)  At last, I pulled on my wetsuit and headed toward the lake.  Coach E has a 1.2 mile course that our group of friends uses for training, but due to the recent rain and the lack of beach at the far end, we had to adjust the course and start at the near end.  Four laps.  Four laps around the buoys that marked the NO WAKE ZONE would be my 1.2 mile course.  Four seemed like SO many, but I was here to do this.  I had not pulled everyone out of the comfort of their beds to watch me give up.

The hubby, my brother, Coach E's wife and I entered the water and made our way to the start point as the rest of the crew watched from the shore, keeping the kiddos entertained as this long adventure was about to begin.  Waiting in the water was Molly with my kayak support and reassurance that if anything went wrong, she would be an arm's length (or a little more) away.

We reached the starting point and I took a deep breath (and maybe stalled a minute). . .

3. . .2. . .1. . .

Started my watch, put my face in the water and started swimming.  The hubby had been right.  The water was amazingly flat and it didn't take long for me to reach the first buoy and turn to start my first loop.

The first loop around the buoys was about getting comfortable and finding a rhythm.  The four of us who were swimming each kept our own pace, staying pretty close together for the first loop and eventually  spreading out for the remainder of the swim.  Molly stayed close by in the kayak, but my goal for this swim was independence.  I didn't want to stop or rest or use her for assistance in any way.  I knew deep down that I could do this swim, and was ready to prove it.  One by one I counted down the laps.  And one by one they seemed to get easier and more effortless.  I later remarked to the hubby that I could honestly say this was the first Open Water Swim that I had absolutely no fear or panic and could actually think of something besides swimming while my face was in the water!  Lap 2 brought a sense of freedom and a chance to focus on breathing and gliding and moving forward.  I was feeling confident and excited that I was half-way to the finish of the swim.  At the start of the third lap, the sound of a boat motor roared through the water and as I turned to breathe, I saw the watercraft quickly approaching the swim area.  As it came to a halt just outside of the buoys, it brought wake and waves to the water and memories of the previous week's terrible swim to my mind.  However, the thought was fleeting.  As the first wave rolled by, I was able to stop my panic before it took over and decided to breaststroke and watch the water until it had calmed.  The rolling waves stopped as quickly as they started and I was able to resume my swim finishing laps 3 and 4 with a new sense of confidence.  As I rounded the last buoy, Molly called to me, "Hey, check your watch," but I wasn't ready to look yet.  I felt that I had been faster than the 1:20:12 that I had posted the previous week that resulted in my DNF in Raleigh, but I wasn't sure how much faster.  I finished out with a quick sprint to the swim area to exit the water and finally took a sneak peek. . .

00:56:57

WHAT??

I had finished the swim almost 24 minutes faster than I had the previous week.  I was elated and didn't mind letting everyone present know of my success.  Last week the shore of that lake was filled with cries of disappointment, but this week I filled it will squeals of joy.  I knew I had it in me.  I had logged pool time that was comparable, but the pressure, the time limits, the rough conditions of the previous weekend were too much for my panic-filled mind to process.  This was the "me" that had trained.  This was the time I had trained for.

After a celebration and a triple check of my watch to make sure it was really working and that was really the time I swam, I ran to the car to transition to the bike portion of this adventure.  I quickly pulled on my tri top, grabbed my bike shoes, visited the bathhouse, and put my water bottles on the bike.  Coach E and the hubby were ready to accompany me on my 56 mile ride.  The kiddos and our friends waved us off and planned to meet us at a "water bottle hand-off point" to replenish our supplies.  As we turned out of the parking lot onto the main road, Coach E explained that he had figured out a route that would take us to the 8 mile marker from Raleigh 70.3.  We would turn around there and ride the same course I would have ridden last weekend up to the 35 mile marker. Once we reached that point (which is where traffic picks up and the roads become more dangerous without official "race" markers) we would turn around and head back to Ebenezer.

I was familiar with a large portion of the ride since I had completed several training rides in the area.  There were some nice stretches of flats, some great rolling hills and a few challenging climbs (and quick descents on the return trip).  The ride was actually enjoyable and the boys let me take the lead, set the pace, and drafted off of me from time to time.  I am not typically the leader when we ride, so this was a new experience, but I knew that this was my ride to pull, like it or not.  Our one and only "aid station" was located at the same point as an aid station from the week prior.  As we approached, I could hear the sound of cow bells and yelling.  Molly and the kiddos had set up on the side of the road and were ready with chilled water bottles from the cooler and bonk breaker bars.  We stopped just long enough for me to eat (a new goal is to fuel while riding--easier said than done), kiss the kiddos, and swap out bottles.  Soon we were off again.  The out and back nature of the ride made the second half seem to fly by even quicker.  Runkeeper estimated my distance at 56.55 miles (Elevation gain of 2521') in 03:40:04, but given the aid station, traffic and stop signs, my watch read closer to 3:45.  (Yes, I would love to be a faster rider. . .  goals.  GOALS!!)

As I rode the 56 miles, the hubby remarked about how quiet I had become.  I admitted that I was worried about what was to come. . .  the run.  Typically the run is my favorite part of triathlon, but it was hot, I had to run 13.1 miles ALONE, and did I mention that it was HOT (88 degrees).  As soon as I dismounted my bike, pulled on my running shoes and swapped my helmet for a visor, I began to question my sanity for putting together this little challenge.  I mean, what did I have to prove?  Why was I doing this anyway?  But I pressed on, knowing that I was so close to what I set out to do.

Amazingly I couldn't convince one person of my support group to run the half marathon that waited for me, baking in the sun.  Not one.  I left the parking lot alone, keeping a decent pace, but reminding myself that there were still many miles ahead of me.  The course for the run was not preplanned.  I had an idea of where I needed to go to make the distance, but I wasn't sure exactly what it would look like.

I had gone about a half mile when the hubby drove by on his way to pick up more bottled water and gatorade.  I was so hot and doubtful.  But he had a cooler full of ice towels and words of wisdom to help me keep moving forward.

**side note: Ice towels are awesome.  I am SO glad that I thought ahead and stuffed clean small towels in the cooler filled with ice.  I was able to swap them out as needed and refresh them when they weren't icy anymore.  I highly recommend them.  Seriously**

After picking up supplies, the hubby and Coach E rejoined me (in their cool, air-conditioned vehicles) on a quiet little country road.  They would drive about a 1/4 mile and stop until I reached their vehicles, offered assistance (ice towels, water, gatorade, endurolytes, anti-fatigue tabs, gu chomps), made sure I was ok, and then drove forward for my next stop.  Sometimes I passed them by with a wave or thumbs up, other times I paused to replenish.  The run was lonely with the exception of their presence and I am so very thankful that they were there to keep my spirits high.

I was able to keep a consistent, albeit slow, pace of 10:55 for the 13.1 hot, hilly miles (854' elevation gain) I covered.  There were no crowds, no loudspeakers, no cowbells and no marked paths.  I dodged traffic and used street signs to pace my walk/run as I ran over the bridges that I had previously biked earlier in the day.

My 70.3 mile journey ended on the road that led to the beach where my swim had begun Seven hours and twenty-nine minutes earlier.  I was alone when my GPS clocked 13.1, and honestly it was a perfect ending to the day.  I took a few seconds to be truly thankful.  Thankful for finishing, thankful for second chances, thankful for friends and family, thankful for my body and what it can do, thankful for ice towels, incredibly thankful for my hubby and thankful for my stubborness and mindset of not being finished.  I had done it.  Sure, it wasn't an "official" race, but it was good enough for me. . . for now.  I had finished what I started.

I continued further down the road and found my little family--the hubby and kiddos, Molly and Coach E.  A length of toilet paper was stretched between The Reporter and Molly for my finish line.  With hands raised, I ran through and knew that I had finally Finished.

And I knew that this was only the beginning.

My 70.3

Swim: 56:57

Bike: 3:40:04

Run: 2:24:01

Total (on my watch after transitions and aid stations): 7:29:20 

                           

Finish What You Started

After being stripped of my timing chip at the end of a difficult and disappointing swim at Ironman Raleigh 70.3, I sat crumpled and crying in my wetsuit while the race volunteers dismantled T1around me.  I watched as each bike rack was broken down, placed into a truck and readied for the next race in the series.

As soon as my tears subsided, I pulled out my cell phone and started scouring the internet for races.

 I wasn't finished.

I had lived in anticipation of this day for nine months and I was crushed to think that weeks of training were all for nothing.

I wasn't finished.

However there was nothing to register for that would be financially or logistically possible in the immediate future, so I settled on waiting to register for a Fall race and maybe add a few shorter races to my summer.  I tried to quiet my anger and sadness by telling myself that I would enter this next training cycle even stronger than I had started the last one, hoping to find peace in that thought.

But then Monday came.

While the hubby enjoyed a well-deserved and needed rest-recovery week, I felt lost.  I didn't need to rest.  I hadn't completed the mileage that I set out to do.  In fact, I NEEDED to run just to get out all of the frustration of not being able to race. So I planned an early morning workout of boot camp and a run on Tuesday morning.

When I returned home from that run and began to get dressed for work, I turned to the hubby and said, "Hey, what if I just go do 70.3 on my own this weekend and treat this week as another taper week?"  I fully expected him to tell me that I had totally lost my mind.  Who just plans their own 70.3?  I went on, "I mean, I don't know what to do with myself.  I'm ready to race.  I'm ready to complete this distance.  I'm NOT finished!"  I continued by telling him that I had thought through most of the logistics on my run that morning  and even though it would be tough and I would need his help to pull it off, I thought we could make it work.  When I finished talking, I expected him to tell me that I was really crazy and there's no way we could pull it off, but he didn't do anything of the sort.  In fact he was fully supportive.

That's when I started making phone calls and drawing up plans--I was going to need some help.  First I called a friend with a kayak to accompany me on the swim.  Since she had been my saving grace when I exited the water just 2 days before, she knew how much completing this distance meant to me and was on board.  Then I texted Coach E.  He knew the lake and surrounding areas and would be able to help me figure out an exact bike and run course.  Coach E knew my triathlon journey and was there for my disappointment on Sunday.  When I asked him what he thought of the idea, his reply was "How soon can we do it?"

For the remainder of the week I did my best to follow my taper plan, keep my nutrition in check, continue to check-in with my support crew and monitor the weather for a Sunday morning 70.3.  Tapering for a second week in a row was more frustrating than I had imagined, but I kept reminding myself of the big picture.  Nutrition was tough due to "End of School Year" goodies and parties, but I did the best I could.  The support crew was all in, calling and texting to firm up plans.  The only thing that could derail this plan was the weather, and it almost did.  On Friday a tropical system came through, dumping rain in the area and we all feared that the lake would be a mess on Sunday morning.  Coach E came through with a quick drive by the lake on Saturday and gave us the green light for Sunday morning, so I gathered my gear, ate my pasta, and went to bed at a reasonable hour, praying that I could follow through and finish what I had started.

INF

I've never been a risk taker.

I like the expected.

I am happiest in my comfort zone.

But when I entered this world of Triathlon, I left my comfort zone on the shore of the lake and began to experience what it felt like to push my limits a little at a time.  With each race came a new challenge--a tougher course, a steeper hill, a longer distance--and as these challenges increased, so did my comfort and my desire to push further, go faster, and take risks.  On August 31, 2012, I took the biggest risk of all since I started this crazy journey in 2009--I registered for a half-iron distance race.  In triathlete speak, this is known as a "70.3" race meaning that it consists of a 1.2 mile swim followed by a 56 mile bike ride and a 13.1 mile run (When you add all those distances up it totals 70.3 miles).  I remember the sense of bewilderment I experienced after entering my credit card number and calling the hubby to confirm that he had registered, as well.

Nine months would pass from the day I clicked "register" until race day.  Nine months of training that would include hundreds of miles of cycling and running, countless laps in the pool, endless hours on the bike trainer, multiple trips to the lake, and nightly stretching and foam rolling, all while carrying on with the daily responsibilities at work, keeping our household running, and supporting the hubby during his training, as well.  There were road blocks along the way including several visits to the Sports Med Doc for knee pain and foot pain which led to my first pair of custom orthotics in April, as well as an 8-week hiatus from swimming due to impingement syndrome in my shoulder that only went away after a cortisone injection.  Along with the physical toll that training for longer distances can bring, emotional and psychological challenges can be just as tough.  For every runner's high, there is doubt and questioning.  For every great workout, there is a challenging one that tests you to find the good and learn from the bad.

However, no amount of training can prepare you for the heartbreak that happens when things don't go as planned on race day.  On June 2, 2013 I stood in the water as the gun went off for my swim wave and I began the 1.2 mile open water swim in Jordan lake to start what I thought would be my first 70.3 distance race.  One hour and twenty minutes later, I completed the swim and emerged from the water, only to be informed that the course had closed five minutes prior and I would be unable to complete the race.  My timing chip was removed and I was instructed to remove my items from the race venue because I was no longer able to move forward in the race.  I sat in the parking lot in my wetsuit crying (and screaming at times), feeling crushed, heartbroken and sick.  Along with several other swimmers who did not meet the "cut-off time", I finally gathered my things, with the help of two amazing friends, and made my way to a friend's vehicle to make the long, sad ride back to Raleigh to retrieve my other belongings.

Meanwhile, my hubby was somewhere on the race course after a fantastic swim, thinking that I would be behind him on the bike course.  It wasn't until he pushed his bike into T2 (transition from bike to run) that he learned that I was no longer in the race.  His face fell when our eyes met, but we both knew he was there to race and finish strong--which is just what he did.  The remainder of the day was bittersweet.  As I cheered him on and waited nervously at the finish for him to cross the line and receive his medal, I fought back tears of disappointment (for me) and joy (for him).  The flood of tears and emotions repeated as each of our friends crossed the finish line and I looked on, no longer a participant, now a spectator.  My heart ached from the emotional toll of the day, but my body ached because I didn't have the opportunity to do what I had trained long and hard to do.

Monday morning I woke up, not only sad but angry.  As much as I wanted to move on, something lingered in the back of my mind that I could not let go.  I knew several weeks prior to the race that my age group of women would be entering the water to swim in the next to last swim wave (wave 20 out of 21).  Race policy states that the swim course closes one hour and ten minutes after the start of the last swim wave.  In essence, the earlier you get in the water, the more time you have.  In fact, I looked up race results and saw that women (and men) in earlier swim waves had swim times 2 minutes, 8 minutes, even 18 minutes longer than my time.  Anger rushed over me as I read through the results.

My results for Raleigh 70.3 read 0:00:00 for my time across the board in all areas, indicating that I did not complete any areas.  But the truth is, I did complete something on June 2.  I completed an Open Water Swim (which has always been my most difficult discipline both physically and emotionally).  And, if given the chance, I feel that I could have completed the remainder of the race.

So, I'm choosing NOT to see this race as a DNF (Did Not Finish), but to see it as an INF.

INF?

What?

Yep.

I'm Not Finished.

Not even close.

I Am Only One. . .

Earlier today I posted about meeting a goal I had set for myself over summer break.  Cycling 62 miles is not some phenomenal distance, but it does require strength and endurance both mentally and physically.  The discomfort that you experience during or after a ride may be bothersome, but eventually it fades and you get back out there and do it again.  And I plan to do just that.

On October 13, I will join hundreds of other women at le Tour de Femme who are riding distances from 15 to 62 miles to raise awareness and funding for Cancer Research and Cancer Survivorship Programs. This is the seventh year that le Tour de Femme has been held in Cary, NC, but my first time participating in the cycling event.  I will be joining friends as we all ride to make a difference.  

Would you consider joining me in my journey?

There are several ways for you to support me and the other riders:

·           make a donation using this link: Erin's Fundraising Page 

·           join me by signing up to participate

·           volunteer

·           help spread the word about the event through email, Facebook and word of mouth

With your help we’ll fulfill the ride’s mission: In the ride against cancer, no one rides alone.

Come Away With Me. . .

It's sad to admit, but since before the birth of the reporter (she's seven), the hubby and I have not taken a proper vacation/getaway from the children.  Sure, she has spent the night at Grandma's while we have a "date night", but to truly get away from home and all of the responsibilities that implies. . . well if an overnight backpacking trip and a one night hotel stay for a wedding in the next city over count, then make that a grand total of TWO nights away. Even more, we had never left the little guy overnight before (he's two).   So you can imagine our excitement when we made plans to travel with friends to Washington DC in June to participate in the DC Triathlon.  We secured our spots in the race as soon as registration was available, began looking at logistics of travel and discussed with my very generous parents the possibility of the kids bunking at their house for two (TWO!!) nights while we got away.  Just when we thought all systems were go, we received an email explaining that the race had been cancelled due to difficulty with National Park Service permits.  (One would think that these little details would have been hammered out when the race was planned, right?)  Needless to say, we were not only disappointed about not getting to bike and run past the White House, but we were especially bummed about our kid-free weekend slipping away.  

Sensing our disappointment and recognizing that our anniversary would fall over my summer break, my mom and dad put the offer on the table to open their home to our children while the hubby and I escaped for a night or two. We discussed possible destinations that would not break the bank (read: cheap to FREE).  We thought we had settled on a backpacking trip to the NC Mountains, but after our crazy beach trip in June included a trip to the Urgent Care we asked my parents if we could use their beach house (Read: FREE) for a weekend away instead. The hubby was scheduled to be off the first weekend in August, so we "booked" our room and babysitting and started planning.

Now for most couples, a weekend away at the beach means indulgent eating, relaxing in the sand, long walks on the beach and lazy mornings sipping coffee on the porch.  However, we had something different in mind. . .

Remember this post? Yeah.

A typical beach trip with kids is like an endurance event in itself.  A morning of running or biking followed by an afternoon in the waves and sand with the kids.  However, our running and biking are adjusted depending on whether or not we have someone to keep the kids (otherwise we "divide and conquer" or tote them along in the jog stroller or bike trailer) and we must reserve some energy for playing on the beach until nightfall. 

This trip was different.  No kids, meant no time or distance limits on biking or running due to babysitting accommodations.  Who needs reserved energy for the late afternoon when you can rest in a chair with a cool beverage knowing that you will not be summoned to build a castle or fly children through the air to "jump" the waves?  This would be a perfect opportunity to try and conquer one of my summer goals.

A half century ride.  50 miles.  

Now this may not sound like a lot to someone who cycles regularly, but my longest ride prior to July was 30 miles, so tacking on an additional 20 was a great goal to try and accomplish late in the summer.  We put in a lot of saddle time during the month of July and by the end of the month I had logged a 42 mile ride and felt confident that 50 was within reach.  The family beach house is situated on an island and the hubby and I calculated that we could log 54 miles by riding to each point from the house.  The plan was made, the kids were dropped off and we hit the road.

The car ride was unusually calm without the background noise of kid whine chatter from the backseat.  The hubby and I had a great time talking and catching up, barely talking about the kiddos at all.  In fact we talked a lot about our weekend plans and big bike ride that we were hoping would lead to a few new goals to add to our fitness list.  I also enjoyed the fact that I could concentrate on completing the Reporter's quilt as we drove without having to dive into the backseat to retrieve books and toys every five miles. 

The next morning we set off early and hit the road.  Although the clouds appeared to be warning us of showers, we didn't let that dampen our enthusiasm.  On our way to the closest end of the island we experienced a few sprinkles but rode on and hoped for brightening skies.  We turned to ride the length of the island (from Emerald Isle to Ft. Macon) and the rain started right as we pedaled out of the town limits.  Luckily it was just a light rain and mist, but that didn't stop the road grime from covering us head to toe.  Eventually we reached the far point of the island and took a break to refuel and enjoy the view.

Ft. Macon--far point of the island

Our ride back was to include lunch, so we chatted about a little place my parents enjoy when they cycle, but when we got there, no seats were available near the window for us to monitor the bikes so we went on to our favorite stop--the Big Oak Drive-in.  Along the way we knew that we would need to refill our water so we pulled into a gas station and grabbed some bottles.  As soon as we pulled out, I heard the unmistakable sound of a flat tire.  We pulled into the next stop and found a covered area to use as a repair shop.  The rain had stopped, but the sun was beating down and the humidity was high.  

Learning to change a tire was something that I had been nervous about, but I had assisted the hubby a few times and wanted to give it a go.  I was doing fine, but half-way into the process he informed me that we only had 1 spare tube and 2 spare cartridges to fill it, so basically this was a one shot deal.  I didn't want either of us to ride home alone, and I was 10 miles shy of my goal, so I handed over the wheel and let him take over. 30 minutes and TWO changes later (long story, but we ended up having to take two wheels off and switch tubes--valve stem issues), we were back on the road and ready for lunch.  

We quickly refueled with a shrimpburger, fries and sweet tea and got back in the saddle. 

Soon we hit my goal. . .

But, we weren't finished, yet.  We had figured out (thanks to my dad who had ridden the day before) that if we rode back to the EI point and THEN to the house, we could round out a metric century ride (62 miles).  Not to be outdone by my dad, I rose to the challenge and we went on. . .

Emerald Isle--our end of the island

And we made it!

We enjoyed the remainder of the afternoon on the beach with adult beverages and celebrated with friends over pizza that evening.  

The next morning I wanted to get in a training run for an upcoming half-marathon that I am toying with, so we set off back to the point at EI (finding some change along the route) for a seven mile outing.  I was surprised by how fresh my legs felt after the miles logged the previous day.

The hubby and I relaxed with a frozen coke and a walk on the beach before heading home to squeeze our munchkins and return to reality.  

This was, without a doubt, the best weekend of the whole summer. We agreed that we shouldn't wait so long to do this next time. . . yearly, maybe?

What a wonderful time to reconnect, achieve some goals and share some new ideas and goals for the coming months. . .